A wierd Problem: Resulting Fight: Resolution

I went out Saturday night without J. The group involved was one that he just doesn’t want to be around – my co-workers, friends and boyfriends, but I didn’t have a choice. It was my going away party, combined with one of their birthdays, etc.

At some point a girl and I started talking. This woman, younger than me, was not the kind of person I hang out with, but seeing as I needed to fill the time, and look busy to fend off any relationship-minded cowboys looking to two-step me around the dance floor, we chatted. She was obviously a sad drunk kind of girl. At one point of the evening, I even pretended to be her lover to keep someone from bothering her again.

Long story short, when I left, she gave me her cell number and told me to text her for her myspace id. It was a pleasant sort of thing, and I’m on myspace about, I dunno, MAYBE twice a month, so I agreed.

A few days later, I did. Now, I’m going to post the message exchange with my notes off too the side. I am boggled on how to handle this.

Me: Hey there. It’s (insert my gender neutral name here) from Saturday…send me your myspace id so I can add you.

Girl: the URL is (not giving that out.)
Girl: I didn’t actually expect to hear from you. lol.

Me: Oh, Well, I wasn’t drunk. I’ll add you when I get home. Thanks.

Girl: K

(Time passes – Hours later)

Girl: So, what do you remember about me? (I’m thinking she’s fishing for compliments, but I find this odd.)

Me: The cute picture you showed me of your baby boy, the cute glasses, short red hair… Oh, and ‘motor boat me, bitch’ (that last one was a reference to the lesbian act we were putting on – i feel obligated to add, that no touching took place)

Girl: LOL nice. And dark burgandy [sic] red. I know youre not interested in me besides as friends so dont get scared. LOL

Me: (confused, thinking two things: 1. Maybe she’s warning me off and someone told me that I liked girls part time. 2. Or that she likes girls and is trying to reassure me.) LOL. Not scared babe. I bite. I used to be a red head.

Girl: I bite back, and I like it.

I don’t answer, thinking that’s a nice end for this unusual string of messages. J in the meantime has noticed that I’m chatting up a girl (of course he thinks I’M the aggressor.) He wants to read my text messages and I tell him no. He then asks me if she’s cute. I say, she’s alright, but not my type. Subject drops.

Later, I get this…

Girl: Now youre scared. lol

Me: (always clever) I was busy making a list of places you could bite.

Girl: Well you’ll have to show me. I cant read.

Me: I don’t know if you can handle it. (I’m detecting flirtation here, but trying to keep it neutral and failing)

Girl: What makes you think you could handle me?

Me: I’ve yet to see a mountain I couldn’t climb. Its pure confidence.

Girl: LOL What do you even remember about me?

Me: That you seemed nice, so I’m trying to match that against the texting vixen I seemed to have encountered.

Girl: LOL hmmm. Havent you ever heard the expression ‘lady in the street, but a freak in the sheets’? Haha and Im a good girl, but I could reduce you if i wanted too and you wanted me too. just not the day i meet you. lol

Me: (oh lord, yes, who hasn’t heard that song.) The first day would be a little fast. But I wasn’t offering.

Girl: do you remember what I look like?
Girl: Im asking because you said what my hair looked like and my glasses, but nothing else.

Me: Yes. I remember just fine. I could pick you out of a crowd.

My phone, at this point, has been vibrating steadily for about a half hour. I’m in bed, trying to read a book and J is snoozing off to my side. He went to bed early. Had a rough day, was already grumpy and later, I find out, my texting was adding to it.

Girl: How tall do you think I am? Come on smart guy. What size bra do you think I wear? LOL

WHOA! Hold the phone!! GUY??? I start coughing because now I realize she must have given her info to more than just me. AND, not only did she not remember my name, but she didn’t remember the name of the guy she met – because unless we had the same name, I did introduce myself in the very beginning.

So now she has switched from a crazy lesbian bitch to a weird, desperate for a date girl.

What did I say? Nothing.

Me: Oh, I’d say you were 5′2 and maybe a C chest.

Girl: wow! you ARE good.

Me: Thanks. Let me get some sleep now.

Girl: k goodnight.

I end the discussion. J at this point has gotten out of bed and wondered up front. I slide under the sheets and doze. A minute later, J wonders back.

J: Angelique, I don’t like this texting you’ve been doing. You barely know the girl.
Me: Don’t worry, I’m done. You coming to bed?
J: I let you go out Saturday, and its good and all, but then you come back with this girls number and wont let me read your messages. I don’t like it.
Me: Let me go out? You didn’t LET me go out. I’m grown J.
J: That’s not my point.
Me: You want to read her text messages, here. Please go ahead and do so. Gleefully.
J: Angelique, that isn’t the point.
Me: What is your point, J? What? Are you afraid that I went out and picked up a woman? Hell I came home EARLY that night? You think we made out in the bathroom stall? Fuck!
J: I’m just trying to protect you. She seems too friendly.
Me: Yea. I got that too. I can handle it. (I don’t tell him that she obviously thinks I have a penis or something)
J: Okay. I’ll leave it to you to manage then. (He lays down next to me, not realizing I’m fuming now. He doesn’t bother to read the text messages on my phone.)

A minute later…
J: Give me a kiss babe.
Me: No.
J: Why not? (He has the nerve to sound offended)
Me: Because you don’t trust me! You think I’m not capable of realizing she’s got the stalker gene? You think I can’t handle a woman just as well as I neuter the men that fuck with me? What did I really do here to piss you off? Did I make out with someone? Did I flirt with someone? Send naked pictures? What did I do J? I had a conversation. I spoke with someone and you got bent over it.
Thanks, that means you don’t trust me.

Silence.

Ten minutes later.

J: Yeah. You’re right. I was being an ass.
Me: Thanks. I was aware.
J: I’m sorry, babe. I just worry about you when I’m not with you.
Me: I can handle myself. I already told you that.
J: And I believe you. I do trust you.
Me: Thank you, J.
J: Can I have a kiss now?
Me: No.

Needless to say, he got his way. He does have this ability to weasel his way into my heart. We kissed, we made up (twice)…

No text messages today, but now, how in the world do I handle this girl?